we are the shadows screaming take us now | Connor

[tarquin finley ellis]

The idea of drugging Connor up didn't really register with Quinn. First, he saw no reason to bother going to such a length for any purpose. He was stronger then the male, and that's all he really needed. Secondly, even if he had the want to drug Connor up, a perk wasn't his first choice. It helped with pain, and sometimes it could be a sort of stimulant, but there wasn't much use for it in ways that would matter to Quinn as far as drugging someone. Not that he was beyond doing something like that at this point, because he wasn't.

The perks had been for himself, though it wasn't a big deal to share, Quinn could get more later. Might as well, because even if Quinn had no intention to drug Connor up to get what he wanted; it would certainly ease any pain in the matter. And having already gotten beaten on didn't help anything. When Connor lifted the shirt, Quinn saw the bruise from earlier -- which actually pissed him off -- and where Connor had just been kicked. He rumbled lowly in his throat, moving to remove the shirt anyways, then settle down next to Connor to continue stroking the feathers while the perk kicked in.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor had taken, and still did take, his share of perks. He was usually into heavier things, needle injections like cocaine and amphetamines. But you couldn't get muchof that here, and he was struggling to savor what he had manahed to sneak in. Because once that was gone, he knew withdrawal might startto be a problem. He didn't use the stuff to maintain a high right now, couldn't waste it. Only when withdrawal symptoms began to show did he dare fill himself up a needle.
Connor had never preferred pills, they took too long to get into the system. But his occasional nose bleeds now were thanks to snorting, his nerve damage thanks to shooting. Enough brain damage to cause that stutter as well.

Connor had been stripped clean of a lot rather suddenly in his life. To him, he had seen drugs as his only escape.
Even now, they seemed to be. He focused on what Quinn was doing in order to distract himself from the pain, reaching over to take his medication as well. Interesting, how his morals contradicted. He wanted to leave this place, take every possible walk with death. And yet he fought to live as well, or didn't take that extra step further to absolutely guarantee he would succeed in suicide. He was starting to get more serious about it, but that cry for attention was there.
Eventually the pill began to kick in and he started to relax a little more, head finding his pillow.

[tarquin finley ellis]

Quinn knew better then to play with too many drugs. He tried to keep it simple enough; easy-going things except for the coke, but even that he wasn't using too very much these days. There was no worry over not having enough or more, because he knew how to get it without much problem. It was not something he was generally inclined to share with Connor, because Quinn wasn't fond of the drugs the male did take already. No need to add to that. Maybe when the male's drug stash ran out and things seemed to go all haywire Quinn might help out a little here or there, but it wasn't going to be something he would do out of the goodness of his heart. That didn't quite fit anymore, did it?

There was the silence other then breathing and whatever sounds Connor was making, and Quinn just continued to rub his hand over the feathers, dipping his face closer as well after a moment. It was a sort of odd comforting musky smell to those feathers that he couldn't quite explain -- nor would he want to -- and it was interesting to realize these things now. When Connor started to relax, Quinn shifted up a little and brushed the male's hair more from his face. "How's the pain?" He asked, wondering just how well the perk was working. Hopefully it was doing a good amount; enough so that it was almost the normal -- if you could call it that -- state of the male's usual aches.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor flinched instinctively as his hair was brushed aside. "Better..." He mumbled softly, curling up on his side carefully. His adaptation to drugs still had a dull throb through his body. But it was something he could deal with, numb enough for right now. He reached out, playing with Quinn's hair absently.

[tarquin finley ellis]

At Connor's flinch, he paused and looked at the male carefully. Quinn hadn't seen all that had gone down before he arrived, but it made sense if the clawed guy had pulled at Connor's hair. It was long and just... there. Quinn honestly would mind pulling it, but he was more interested in his own hair being pulled rather then doing much but a quick tug to someone else's. Anyway, he'd just refrain from too much hair play for the time being.

At least Connor was feeling a little better, which was good. When the male reached out to play with his hair, Quinn made a thrilled little sound in his throat, closing his eyes and tilting his head closer. Yes, this was very nice indeed. Kept him satisfied enough just to continue laying there, fingers going back to brush over Connor's wings absently.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor bit his lip at Quinn's reaction, hesitant of giving the other male any reason to take advantage of him. Still, he decided not to stop, because playing with Quinn's hair was soothing to himself as well. He closed his eyes as fingers ran along his wings again. It was odd, how he could feel such touch along the things, and how calming it really was. He supposed he had to give credit to the staff for being genius enough to create such freaks out of them. Never had he believed anything like this was possible.

[tarquin finley ellis]

He kept pretty still except for the hand running along Connor's wing, not wanting to disrupt the touching of his hair. Interesting that even now he could go from violent jungle cat to a purring kitten with such simple little things. Quinn doesn't think too much on the intelligence of the staff or the possible good or helpful that being what they ended up being were. Quinn dealt with the fact that this had happened, that there was still a lot of things to it that could have been avoided. Why were they even doing this at all? Didn't make that much sense. Was it just because they could?

Either way, Quinn doesn't need to pry the whys of it apart. He will deal with his lot in life and go through it. There was no knowing where it would take him, but Quinn wanted to just live it how he liked. For now, this was good. Just going through the motions, doing as he pleased. Right now, Quinn's mind was freed from other thoughts; he didn't even need to think at all. He would just enjoy this for however it lasted.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor would have fallen asleep right then and there, had that dull ache not been enough to still be bothersome. He was relaxing though, getting rather close to simply drifting off despite himself. He hated how he hadn't even been able to defend himself today. He knew he needed to start eating. Starving was getting painful, and he probably only had a few days if he kept it up. It was self torture though... He didn't want to go out suffering.. That was the one thing he was trying to avoid.

[tarquin finley ellis]

Any little thing that would have gotten Connor willing to eat again, to try was a good thing in Quinn's book. He half expected this to not last more then a few weeks at most, and had started to simply grow complacent with the fact. There wasn't any other way to look at it, and there was no way they could keep Connor alive for too much longer if the male didn't try himself. Quinn knew that, and he'd started to accept it. In some ways, he had started to really understand. In his own warped way, of course.

He wasn't all that tired as he lay there stroking along those feathers and feeling the fingers at his hair. It was a lulling sort of thing though, and it had an overwhelming calming effect on him. Another soft spot to crush underfoot eventually, though for now he just gave into it, not wanting the feeling to go away.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor shifted his weight after a moment, letting out a content sigh. It had been too long since he had been so relaxed, and in his calmed state of mind, his usually negative thoughts were a little more..rounded. They wouldn't go away, no. But right now they weren't so set in stone. He vowed to try and eat something tomorrow if his sick body did survive another night.
Shivering absently, he moved a little closer to Quinn. He wasn't sure if the male would be there in the morning. But if so, maybe he would ask him to breakfast, and actually try. Even if they could never even be friends, even if Quinn only saw him as something to possess now, Connor was trying to make it a little more positive than it had recently been.

[tarquin finley ellis]

He heard the sigh and smiled faintly, still not bothering to budge at all. He had no wish to disrupt this, no will to move away from it. Yet at the shifting closer of the male, his eyes opened for a moment. Just looking and accepting of the closeness before his eyes shut again. There were no plans on what he would do when he woke up tomorrow, not sure if he would leave before Connor woke up or if he would wake later. It was all up in the air, and Quinn didn't have anything important to do in the morning. He'd deal with that considering how he felt about it then.

For now he was not thinking about it. It was better to just leave it alone and let things come as they would. Quinn did have a few things to sort out a little better tomorrow, but it wasn't exactly something that could be rushed, and morning or noon or later at night; any of those were fine to get things settled. Hell, he wasn't expecting much change for at least a week. And so he figured that if Connor slept better tonight then he had been, he could wander in at night and sleep near the male for the remainder of the week. Connor might not even last that long, so why not?

[connor crayze sykes]

After awhile Connor's fingers slowed to a stop in Quinn's hair, the rise and fall of his chest slowing and softening, maintaining that uneven pattern. Luckily it didn't stop this time. He was exhausted. His thin body remained relaxed up against the other male, twitching and grinding his teeth occasionally in his slep, but otherwise put at ease with another body next to him throughout the night.

[tarquin finley ellis]

Quinn was still a bit dazed when the motion of fingers in his hair stopped, but even when he finally did snap out of it -- he hadn't actually moved -- he simply looked at Connor for awhile, watching the slow rise and fall of the male's chest before he decided to stay put and go to sleep. So with a carefully quiet yawn, he closed his eyes again and allowed his thoughts to take over as he drifted off into sleep. It wasn't bad at all, and Quinn was able to sleep soundly through the hours, not even thinking about what the morning could bring.

But he did wake up slowly in the morning, noting the fact that he wasn't alone -- Connor's bed judging by the scent -- and he remembered the night in a flood of thought. It only took him a second more to open his eyes and stare at the male beside him, making sure he was breathing still. It was apperently second nature to check at this point, just in case.

[connor crayze sykes]

Connor didn't stir right away. But when he did, aches washed over him and he bit down on his lip carefully, rolling over and touching a hand along his bruised gut. Finally blue eyes opened to look at the male beside him. The circles beneath his eyes weren't as dark as the day before, but the pain in their depths was just as prominent. He was hurting and knew it was getting worse without food.

Connor stretched the slightest bit, huffing faintly to silence any whimpers of pain. That would get him nothong, he knew.

[tarquin finley ellis]

Once he was sure Connor was still breathing, he shifted slightly and glanced about the room idly, wondering if he should get up and go or wait awhile longer. See if Connor would get up soon. Of course he didn't have to wait all that long before the male stirred, and Quinn was back to watching Connor. He saw the how the male bit his lip and rolled over to touch at the bruises at the stomach. Quinn frowned at this, but the expression evaporated when blue eyes opened and looked at him. It was a rather blank gaze that was returned, still fuzzy from sleep.

At least the winged male looked a little better; must have slept well enough. That worked, which was good. Quinn watched as Connor stretched, able to detect the pain anyway and shifting about again to slide the back of his hand over the male's side. "Do you need something?" He asked, wondering if water or the male's medication would help or whatever might be needed. Get that out of the way, then Quinn would skip off to the bathroom quick and decide what to do from there.