(ALIK) but never you.

[alik marai romonov]

Alik swallowed, trembling in his brother's arms.
He heard Kira scoff, before the other older male was sitting down and reached to pat Zakk'ri's back gently. "No.." He murmured. "He's just real beat up. You'll make it better. You always do." He smiled, then stood. "I'll go find wsome bandages."
Alik swallowed, coughing softly and crying out into Zakk's chest. He didn't think anything was broken, but it didn't mean those daunting memories of abuse before they left home weren't there.
His busted lip had started to gradually heal, along with a few gashes and fainter bruises. But each one had him more exhausted.
Eventaully Kira scaled back up the wall and sat down to wrap Kira's shins gently. "Firgured he wouldn't have to deal with this again.." Kira murmured. "I'm so sorry Alik... "
He sat back, looking at Zakk'ri. "She sure never beat the ones rela-. Us.." He mumbled, clearing his throat and squirming.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

"Don't scoff at me, you oaf!" Zakk'ri said, trying to be serious. But he couldn't. He knew Kira meant nothing by it. He held Alik tight as Kira left, trying to keep pressure on all his wounds at the same time. "It'll be okay, brother. Its gonna be alright." He breathed, kissing the side of his head. He watched Kira climb back up, taking the bandages from him. He slowly started wrapping the worst of his wounds, looking up as Kira corrected himself. "No, Kira. Spit it out. Mum never hit who? What makes me and you more special than Alik, huh?" He asked, glaring at his twin. He didn't know what he'd meant by that, but he sure was hiding something. "Come out with it before I shove you off this roof, brother."

[alik marai romonov]

Alik opened his eyes, watching them warily. Kira just fidgetted. "Uh..the ones..related to her..?" He offered sheepishly. He hadn't knoen until a little before she had walked out on them. But he hadn't dared say anything, just glad Alik had a chance to be away from the abuse. He had asked his mom why she beat Alik once. After all, she had adopted him, right?
Maybe she just hadn't loved him. Kira never did recieve an answer, just a slap to the face, and a laugh with alcohol tainted breath. Somewhere, their mother had just stopped being able to love. Even them.
"I should have told you. I'm sorry... I didn't want anyone hurt I-" He broke off guiltily as Alik looked at him with a trembling jaw, fresh tears in his eyes.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

Zakk'ri glared at him, his eyes cold. He slowlu stood, dropping the roll of gauze into Alik's lap. "So you mean to tell me.." It was clear it was taking everything Zakk'ri had not to rip his twin's throat out. Zakk'ri felt sick to his stomach, his knees weak. How was he supposed to take this? "He's not my blood? You have any idea what's gone though my mind about him? You knew damn good and well, Kira! I fucking told you! I felt like a creep and you still kept this?!" He'd never been so dizzy, so sick. He didn't know what to do, confused tears falling down his cheeks. "Kira.."

[alik marai romonov]

"I-..don't cry Zakk... I didn't say anything because Alik was finally away from it all...he was safe with us..we could actually be a family.." He hugged Zakk'ri tight, biting his lip as he spotted the tears falling down Alik's cheeks as well.
Alik was in shock. They weren't related..? And nobody had told him..he'd grown up with a mother who took her anger out on him, and he wasn't even hers.
"I didn't want him hurt..." Kira choked. Alik gripped at the gauze that had been dropped into his lap, reaching to wipe at his cheeks.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

Zakk'ri grabbed his brother as he was hugged, glaring at him. He wanted to hit him or shake him or shove him off the roof. "I can't believe you.." His hands tightened around his arms, tears still falling down his cheeks. "You- I told you I was having dreams about him, that I kept thinking of him in the most inappropriate ways and you dared to keep it a secret?! This was driving me insane and you-" He gagged, clamping his hand over his mouth. He was sure he was going to be sick, and he sat down heavily on the roof, looking back at Alik. "I'm sorry I was the reason you got hit.." He mumbled, feeling awful. Alik would never have been hit if he hadn't been adopted by their mother.

[alik marai romonov]

Kira didn't pull away until Zakk'ri gagged and sat down. "I didn't know how to tell you..." He whispered. "Mum was drunk a few nights before she left. She said we were so young we hadn't know the difference.. All you had wanted was a baby brother, and she wanted you happy... But when she lost her baby during pregnancy, she adopted straight out of the hospital and-"
Alik was sobbing softly to himself, silently, and Kira lowered his gaze.
But Alik couldn't blame Zakk'ri. Their mother had hated him because he wasn't hers. But she'd adopted him so Zakk could be happy. "It's not your fault..." He choked.
'It's all his fault.'
'Nobody loves you Alik.'
Alik cringed, holding his head.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

"Not like this.. I didn't want a baby brother like this.. I-I.. I didn't want a brother I was going to start falling in love with, Kira.." Zakk'ri rubbed at his face, so confused. "Of course this is my fault, Alik. I was the one who wanted a baby brother, someone to look after. But I didn't get a baby brother. I got a best friend disguised as my mum's kid." If he hadn't wanted Alik, the boy might have a happy family. He would be back in Russia, sure. But he'd be happy and okay. Zakk crawled back over to Alik, gently brushing his tears away. "We don't love you any less. Kira meant well.." He said quietly, kissing his forehead.

[alik marai romonov]

Kira swallowed, lowering his gaze in shame. They all would have been better back in Russia, away from here. That's where the belonged...
Alik huffed siftly, reaching to hug Zakk closer, his pain forgotten in the mess of confusion and tears. But the voices persisted, telling him otherwise against Zakk'ri's words. He held onto him desperately, terrified they might up and leave.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

Zakk'ri hugged him tightly, gently running his hand through the boy's hair. "I'm not gonna let go.." He breathed, kissing his forehead gently. He closed his eyes, gently pulling him into his lap. He gently rocked him, humming an old lullaby to him. He looked up at Kira, holding his arm out to his brother. He wanted them both there in his arms, to be able to pretend if only for a moment that they were still just their old family.

[alik marai romonov]

Alik swallowed, burying his face. He scootes over some when he felt Kira curl up at Zakk'ri's side and reach to rib his back.
Focusing on Zakk's humming, eventually the arguing in his head faded away and he rubbed at his face, sighing shakily. They were all such messes it wasn't even funny. Alik squirmed as his pain got the best of him, only the worst of marks still there or bleeding. His shinsached, but hhe didn't dare complain. Not now.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

Zakk'ri hugged both his brother's close, slowly running his hand over Alik's back. He looked him over, grabbing the gauze again. He tore it apart from the roll where he'd been bandaging him, and slowly started wrapping the wounds that were bleeding. "We're gonna fix you up." He said quietly, kissing his forehead gently. He pulled him back into his lap once he was done, his hand resting on Kira's back. He loved Kira, despite what he sometimes did for him. He thought he loved him a little more now that he knew Kira was his only sibling. it didn't mean he didn't still adore Alik though.

[alik marai romonov]

Alik let him finish wrapping up what hadn't healed, and he nestled close before reaching up to wipe at his damp cheeks again. "This doesn't change nothing?" He mumbled hoarsely. Sometimes his words tended to be childish in their own way -- he hadn't been speaking English as long as the other two. But the insecurity there was something else, terrified Zakk'ri wouldn't love him in the same way anymore. He heard Kira draw in a breath, frowning, and Alik lowered his gaze.

[zakk'ri jon romonov]

"This doesn't change a single thing." Zakk'ri breathed, gently running his fingers through his brother's hair. He kissed his forehead gently as he pulled him closer, rocking him gently. The way he saw it, it really didn't change anything. They were brought up as siblings, and that's what they'd always be. He was wrong for thinking the way he did, and he knew it. Maybe he was just a lot more off than the other two. Sure, him and Kira had anger issues, but neither of them were stupid enough to fall for their brother. That was just sick, right? How dare he think such a thing? "You think if we sleep up here, they won't find us?" He asked, looking over at Kira.

[alik marai romonov]

Alik curled closer, arms wrapping around Zakk'ri's neck. He hugged him tight, tilting his head to watch Kira sprawl on his back. "I'm sure we'd be fine. At least for a night." It was still light enough out to see though. Alik peered up at the sky a moment, shifting his weight, stretching his legs out some. He played with Zakk's shirt, hands shaking.